Security Blankets

My inner child has been drinking
Not me
No, not me

Because I have been thinking
That I don't need to be drinking
At least
Not every night of the fucking week

And I have been thinking
About how my body needs a break
Before it breaks
If it hasn't already
Broken, with secret aches
That will reveal themselves
At later dates

And I have been thinking
About how the liquid in the
Glass or tin
Helps me avoid a change within
An acceptance I will not make
Like a ghost feeling
From the death of god
I'm still caught up in its wake
Still alone, for Christ's sake
And holding onto loss
Like it holds me

As if, since God, I've been incomplete
As if, since Love, I've been incomplete

But, it's my inner child that's been drinking
Not me
No, not me